Nom de Guerre

Born on 20th of October 2009, a pseudonym I penned for myself. 

Victor : from Latin victor, from victus, past participle of vincere, to conquer

Saudade : from Portuguese saudade, from soidade/soydade, an intimate feeling and mood caused by the longing for something absent that is being missed

He's born to conquer my feelings of longing for erst-while lovers.

Yet, it feels he's not living up to his name.

Shower Dyshporia

As the cold water drizzles over his skin, he stands in the shower with his head lowered staring down at the pooling water at his feet. Words from old conversations echoing in his head. Then it struck him in a raspy whisper, "Unworthy". The feeling of rejection swamping over him, as his self-worth slowly pouring down the drain. He lathers his body with callous hands, gently but firmly running his hands down his shoulders, locking into an embrace. Water or tears, it all keeps flowing down his face.