14th-15th-16th

It was an hour almost midnight on the eve of the 14th, but He insisted that he see me despite the late working hours.

A surprise, indeed, for our celebration of the 15th. 

We don't really count, but he remembered we're on our 16th month.

To my sweet chinito, I'love love you always.

"Kami."

May 2, 2013

Basically that's how I told my mom about my sexuality. Brief. Concise.

Awful.

"Nasaan si Girlfriend?"

Initally a comment to Mamon's entry, but it turned out good enough for an entry.

Ang isang tanong ay maaaring makakuha ng iba't ibang kasagutan. Depende sa pakay ng nagtatanong o sa impresyong mayroon sila sa likod ng pagtatanong.

"Bakit wala kang girlfriend?"

1. may nahuhumaling sa yo - kesyo dalaginding, muher, cougar, or sugar puffy, sila'y sadyang nang-uusisa sa pag-asang magkaisang palad kayo. Sa tono mahuhuli, "Bakit wala kang girlfrieeeend?" - malumanay at banayad, minsan pahaba, ang pagkakabigkas sa huling pantig ng "girlfriend".
2. marahil ikaw ay SSB (singleton since birth, o sadyang solo sa buhay), ni kakambal sa uma wala - "Bakit wala ka pa ring girlfriend?" ang mas akmang tanong (sadyang ayaw nila ipamukha sayo ang kanilang pagkainip). Kadalasang setting: Family Gathering, Pistang Bayan, High school reunion, sa mga kasalan, binyagan, at birthday party ng inaanak. 
3. kung nagkaroon na ng girlfriend subalit matagal nang wala - katulad sa #2 ang akmang pangungusap, "Bakit wala ka pa ring girlfriend?". Kadalasan mga matagal nang kaibigan o malalapit na tao na may alam ng Dating history mo ang nagtatanong nito. 
4. mga Sgt. Snoops - ang kanilang pagtatanong e may bahid na ng pangungutya. "Bakit wala ka ngang girlfriend?" kung matalas ang pandinig mo. May hinala sa maaaring kasagutan (nothing specific, really), subalit may gusto silang tugon na marinig; tipong mapahiyaw sila ng "Tumpak!"...or in most cases, "Confeeeermed!" sabay kampay sa kumare.
5. meron ding kombinasyon ng #1 at #4, fish combo meal ba ga - "Bakit hindi na lang ako ang girlfriend?", may halong fishing for answers for personal gain. Kampay ulit sa kumare sabay kagat labi.

Oh, and I've been asked before with the same question when i reached my early 20's (21 to 24) - by naive girl friends, clueless boy friends, my hopeful parents, and even some of my relatives during fiestas. Quick answer to family and relatives : "Studies and career muna." To friends and potentials: "Just haven't found the right one." -not in verbatim, but same point. My answeres then were not in evasion, but of honesty. Besides, those were the years that I focused more on myself. Call it YOLO, LOVEYOURSELF, or METIME; but these were the years I rediscovered myself and put first things that matters most.

And it ain't girlfriends nor boylets.

A Quickie

as much as I'd like to have a long discourse about sex, I can't -  for the lack of time, creativity and energy,. oh and libido.

I'd simply would like to declare that, I WOULD LIKE A HOT FUCKING GOODSEXY TIME.

But...
I can't.

Because when I start going down on business....
I lose...

"focus".

It's actually a realization, that when I go for a hookup, I kind of bail out, or umaagtras ang libog, on the last minute. Call it hang up, inhibition, indecisiveness...
I simply call it, "Not meant for me".

I do get horny most of the time. My libido spikes up that it drives me rabid. But in the end, a reckless hookup doesn't drive me to the edge. I may yearn for flesh, for heat, for ecstasy, orgasm to the brink of eternity... But without romance and passion to drive me uphill and push me off the edge, they're all but naught to me.

Poll #1 : Definitions

1. When can you say that you're "seeing someone"?
2. How would you define dating?
3. What does "nothing serious" exactly mean?

I'd really like to get some feedback on this. If you must ask, yes, I am seeing someone, but we're not exactly dating yet, since we're both not looking for something serious.

In Bullets

I have a few notes to say... to myself.

• Wala muna akong ikukwento, kasi bigla kong naisip, may mga makakarelate sa kwento. haha! Yes, marami nang nakakabasa, and the thing is, the guys I'm about to make kwento are the ones reading this blog. That would be awkward, right? So... Hindi na lang. Haha!
• Oh but I'd like to clear that up, I'm not sleeping around with guys. I did mention in the previous post that I've got kwento to tell about boys. Well, I think that'll be my next kwento, where are these boys coming from. *on cue: Bring the boys out!*
• Hmmm... Closet blog pa ba ito? Naman eh! Now I can't freely write about particular guys because they'll be able to read it. hmmm... Maybe I should change url, no?
• By the way, this closet blog of mine has just turned 1 this Christmas. Not much of a celebration - so did my Christmas. hohum.
• There are these decent guys that I'd like to write about... kaso, lugi ako. They get a peek at my thoughts, habang sila e di ko man lang mabasa ang mga saloobin. 
• I'd like to think that I'm good at reading people. I just wish people knew how to read me. As in take a good time, just reading me. Pampam ba? haha!
• I've got some free time. But it'll be over soon. Back to business... farewell to boys? Hmm. 
• I'd like to have cake. As always, I'm craving for food :P

Just because I'm not in an awesome mood to come up with a decent writing - we hit it off with bullets!

Bang! Bang! ;)

Of Gusts and Tides

Fck.

Wala pang isang buwan mula nang nangumpisal ako, mukhang nababali ko na ang aking panata. Biglang nag-iba ang ihip ng hangin nitong nakaraang linggo, malakas ang hampas pabaling sa kabilang direksyon.